Ten Thoughts After Losing Your Job (And How to Move On)

For whatever reason, you’ve lost your job. Maybe you saw it coming, however most likely you didn’t. Here’s some thoughts on how to process what happened and how to move forward to your next best thing.

#1 Emotions a plenty. Let’s get right to it. Emotions. Eww. (Just kidding). I’m going to be vulnerable on this one. There will be a lot of emotions. From grief, to sadness, to anger, or a mix of all three. It feels like a bad breakup, and man has it been a long time since I’ve had one of those. Some days I am great, want to kick butt, and know my best days are ahead. Other days, a moment hits me where I am down and just don’t understand. In the last two weeks I've experienced a lot of emotions, and many times through. The thought of why me? Why now? Is something wrong with me? Then at times a sense of peace and relief wash over me. This was meant to be. Your feelings are valid and there for a reason. Feel them, process them, and then pick yourself back up.

#2 It's not you, it's them. Trust me. Why would you want to stay somewhere that doesn't see the value in you? You don’t. I don’t. Go where you will be valued, respected, and treated with the same loyalty you gave your last employer even though it wasn’t returned. Your worth is not defined by what title or job you have.

#3 Take your time. Before you just jump back into looking for jobs, making connections, and figuring out how to pay your bills, truly take some time to think. What can you learn from your last experience? I can say while I didn't expect to lose my job, my last role gave me many opportunities to learn some new things, lead new projects, and expand and grow myself in ways that I hadn't experienced in a very long time. For that I'm grateful. Figure out what you've learned and apply those lessons to how you approach the workforce moving forward.

#4 Reaffirm your values. Who are you? What do you want from life? What makes you tick? Instead of just jumping back in where you left off, evaluate is that what you really want? What are your values? There are many ways to figure out your values, a simple internet search can provide you with a list of words to choose from. My values are integrity, growth, and authenticity. I approach all things in life from that perspective. Remind yourself or decide for yourself who you are and what you want. Then proceed.

#5 Find the joy. As hard as it is, I can tell you I'm already experiencing so many joyful moments. The extra-long snuggles in the morning with my kids. An extra-long walk on top of my workout because the weather is nice. More phone conversations than I've had in a long time with friends, former colleagues, and bosses, catching up, encouraging one another, just supporting each other. Some of those conversations have led to tough real-life issues, which reminds me looking for a job isn’t that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things. I've enjoyed impromptu coffee dates and numerous lunches catching up with friends. Not that I don't see them, however this season gives me even more time to do things that I really want. I want to spend my life with those that I love. I don’t live to work. I work to LIVE. Enjoy this time.

#6 Make YOU time. Please, whatever you do, do not look for a job 8 hours a day. You will absolutely burn out, and quickly. I've made a list of things that I want to tackle each day that I didn’t have as much time for before. That includes learning Spanish a little longer each day, taking at least an hour a day to read or take some sort of a course to expand additional skills that I want to improve. Truth be told, sometimes it's just sitting on the couch thinking and trying to figure this out. I’ve even snuck in a couple cat naps, because let’s face it, I don’t have time for those…ever, as a working mom. Have some structure to your day and at the same time utilize this gift you’ve been given.

#7 Better things are on the way. Believe if one door closes, then another door will open. And if it’s not a door it'll be a window. If you aren't in a place to receive, you won't receive the blessings headed your way. Keep your eyes and ears open. Don’t listen to yourself, talk to yourself. Recite positive affirmations, keep an optimistic mindset, remind yourself of all the good things in your life already. Trust that your best days are ahead of you.

#8 Move forward. Every day take a step forward. Some days you'll look for jobs longer, some days you'll make more connections, or there could be days you might not have the energy to look for jobs at all. There will be days you might just sit and contemplate. All of that is OK and all of that will get you to your next step.

#9 Quality versus quantity. Apply this rule when it comes to how you approach finding a new job. Don’t just blindly apply to every job out there that you can find that sounds remotely interesting. Figure out who the HR recruiters are for a job you applied for and follow up with them. Introduce yourself to as many headhunters and recruiters that you can. Ask your network to do the same. One person introduced me to three headhunters just by me asking. I have no doubt that my next opportunity will most likely be from a recruiter or referral.

#10 Don't be afraid. Don't be afraid to take that next step. Don't be afraid to completely just pivot and do something different. Don't be afraid to start going after that dream that you've always thought about and have never spoken out loud. Don't be afraid to let your friends and family know that you're struggling and need support right now. Reach out to your connections and ask them to help introduce you to recruiters, make connections, or get an in with a company. If not now, when? Fear being in the same place tomorrow as you are today.

I hope these ten thoughts helped you. It’s amazing to me how much I’ve learned and grown in just two short weeks since losing my job. Keep your head up. Stay in the game. I believe that you and I are both on our way to bigger and better things.